Friday, April 27, 2007

He just doesn't get it

I have to share something funny before Cinderella goes to bed (the clock has already struck midnight). I had a really interesting day to say the least. Morgan was seriously out of control to the point where I had to turn up "Hallelujah" by CeCe Winans then go in the other room and beg the Lord to fill me with His Spirit before I lost my mind. Does anyone have days like that? Anyway, nothing could make her happy today to the point where I was in tears. I got to spend some time with one of my precious friends who is going to go over seas next year. She has been such a blessing and encourager in my life and I am really happy and sad at the same time that she is leaving. I was in the car listening to a sermon after I left her and I was overwhelmed. I so want to please the Lord and live in obedience to Him yet I so often choose self over Him. I was just sick of me as I listened to the Word. When I got home from visiting with my friends I came in crying. I didn't want Morgan to see me crying so I handed her to Rod and went upstairs and WAILED before the Lord. I am talking LOUD crying for about 40 minutes. I had let a lot of stuff build up and I just needed the cry. I prayed as I cried that the Holy Spirit would intercede on my behalf as I didn't have the words to pray. All I could think about was how much I want to spend more time in the Lord's presence and how much I needed Him to fix me in certain areas. I felt a lot better after I got it out. I came downstairs (and no rod did not even come check on me) and Rod said "Jenny, I am so sorry that you are crying about your friend leaving." I was floored...not that I don't love her...but that is NOT what I was crying about. I couldn't believe after how loud that cry was he thought that was why I was crying. It reminded me of Jesus asking Mary why she was crying...
I haven't had a cry like that in a LONG time...I guess since I lost Shelby...
Sometimes, we just need to cry in the Presence of the Lord. We need to pour out our hearts like water in His presence and just get it all out!! We can always cry on our Fathers shoulder.
Sometimes the men folk just don't get us. :)

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