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Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Blessing

Psalm 63:5 My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods;
with singing lips my mouth will praise you.

My little sweetie has been at her MiMi and Pop's since Friday. It was almost more than I could take... I missed that little boog' so much! She didn't miss me, which I am glad. She loves her Mimi and Pop like nobodies business. When she went to meet them on Friday she waved and encouraged me to go so she could go and have the time of her life at their house. I am so thankful that they love her and she loves them. Anyway, I could not wait to get off of work and head to Moody to meet up with them. She was so happy to see me and I was thrilled to see her. That was too long for her to be away from her momma I told her. She is laying next to me all dressed in pink just sleeping away. I can't tell you the nights that I sit up and watch her sleep. I usually pray over her and ponder. I try just to take it all in that God would allow me to steward this tiny 2 foot blessing. I will never get one second of our time back so I want to enjoy it every moment.


Rod went to Iowa to hunt for the week and I had to work all weekend so she got a mini vacation so I could work. It is so easy to get in complaining mode at all of the tasks that we have as mothers and it is even easier to miss out on the blessing of life and relationships as we get so distracted. When I had free time this weekend there were times when I wondered what I should do with myself. If you are a mother it is so easy to start to attach your identity to your children that you are kind of lost when you are alone. I want to be known as Morgan's mommy and certainly fulfill my duties as her mother, but I don't want to ever lose my identity of who I am in Christ Jesus by allowing others to take His place of fulfillment. I sort of felt an emptiness and loneliness when she wasn't around...almost like I was kind of down in my spirit if you know what I am talking about. The Lord used this time to call me to Him and have some extra time to pray and clean my house :) and also teach me that it is okay to be alone and to be still before Him. I know the Lord wanted to show me that I need to be filled with Him and allow Him to tend to my heart when no one was around. I needed to enjoy Him instead of feeling sad and lonely...He is always there and I got that check in my spirit that I was sort of allowing relationships (even if it be my child) to fill me and not the Lord. Does anyone know what I am talking about?

Well, it is getting late but I think about the following verses as I sit and watch over Morgan as she sleeps. I have said this before and here it is again...I can never begin to explain the ministry that the Lord has done in my heart through having this child. I never really felt loved as a child and through the love I have for Morgan, which this love comes from God, I can get a pin-hole glimpse of how much God loves me and it really does my heart good. You may not be like me, but if you have not felt loved will you hear the Lord say this over you...He loves you so much.

Zephaniah 3:17 The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
he will quiet you with his love,
he will rejoice over you with singing."


2 comments:

Stephanie (Ocean Mommy) said...

This was an awesome post. Sometimes God just needs our undivided attention for a little while. How cool is it that He gave you a few days to rest and soak in His presence!

I know you missed that sweet little one, I always miss my girls. That kind of love hurts when it's seperated! You're right, how much more does God love us!?!!?? It's incredible isn't it.

blessings!
steph.

Susan said...

Jenny. I just can't seem to come up with the words I want to express to you over this post. I've mulled it around for a couple days now. Bottom line...you ARE loved. Always have been. And I have realized lately that I had to go thru some things as a child, teen, young adult so that my children would not have to. And I can now call that a blessing.
Love, Susan