I have been busy studying but I wanted to take a minute to share something as my continuation from my post on Monday. Bible study went well on Tuesday and I am so in love with this group. Not that I haven't loved my other groups but this one is just very special to me. The Lord has brought some wonderful women who are truly desperate for God. You can see the hunger in them. Another thing about them is that they are so real. I love for people to open up and share so we can all connect and know that we are not alone on this journey.
I wanted to share a few things that the Lord has been dealing with me on.
First off, Hannah from 1 Samuel 1. I shared about this on Tuesday but I want to talk about it here to.
Please read the passage for yourself and see what the Lord would have you to apply to your own life.
Here is a brief version:
There is a man named Elkanah who has two wives (problem number one) Peninnah (for sake of time we will call her Penny) and Hannah. Hannah has no kids and Penny has kids...Elkanahs kids. It was customary for the men to multiply wives back in that time...that is not something appointed by God. His plan was always one man and one woman. Anyway, you also know that the Hebrew people considered it a disgrace to be barren.
We first need to recall what the following verses say:
5 But to Hannah he gave a double portion because he loved her, and the LORD had closed her womb. 6 And because the LORD had closed her womb, her rival kept provoking her in order to irritate her. 7 This went on year after year. Whenever Hannah went up to the house of the LORD, her rival provoked her till she wept and would not eat. 8 Elkanah her husband would say to her, "Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don't you eat? Why are you downhearted? Don't I mean more to you than ten sons?"
-The Lord closed her womb
The Lord allows trials in our lives to test our faith which is of greater worth than gold(1 Peter 1). There is always something greater at stake with the pain in our lives. We can choose to lay down in defeat over whatever it is or we can seek to learn and grow closer to God because of it.
-Her rival kept provoking her. The enemy knows where you are weak. he is an opportunist and he wants to play on your weaknesses and heartaches. he has no heart. he also wants to get you to doubt God and he wants to tempt you like he tempted Eve in the garden to think that God is holding out on you. An army doesn't go out into battle without a plan. You and I have got to look at where we are weak and begin to realize that as human as our enemies that provoke us may seem, that our war is not against flesh and blood. The enemy is too strong for us in our own flesh (Ps 18:17) but he is not stronger than Christ in us. We have to keep running to the Lord in prayer and clinging to His word if we want to make it here. I wish I could tell you something different but I can't.
One thing I love about this passage is that Hannah wept and was bitter. As Christians we all will feel and struggle. You are not more spiritual for not feeling or experiencing emotions.
So you and I have a choice with our own bitterness and tears. Hannah chose to pray to the LORD.
Lamentations 2:19 says this:
19 Arise, cry out in the night,
as the watches of the night begin;
pour out your heart like water
in the presence of the Lord.
Lift up your hands to him
for the lives of your children,
who faint from hunger
at the head of every street.
When I first read this verse I got the mental picture of a glass of water representing my heart and pouring out that water representing me coming into prayer and spilling out all of my hurt and disappointment before the Lord.
-Hannah was misunderstood. The Lord made us and unfortunately others will never be able to "get us" in the way that our Creator gets us. She was provoked and misunderstood by even her husband and Eli the priest. Your own husband, friends, and even people at church aren't always going to get you.
One of my favorite parts is when Elkanah tries to comfort her by asking why he isn't good enough (v 8). Sunday night I just began to sob over so many things. There are so many people hurting all around me. People struggling with huge giants of depression, addiction, feelings of unforgiveness, people struggling to come back to Christ after they have run so far, family struggles, rejection, disorders, loss of loved ones, and I was just so overwhelmed with the needs and just cried my eyes out wishing there was something I could do. I also was crying over some of my own personal stuff and Rod came in and said "Babe, what is wrong...you know it is late and I can't handle you crying (translation...I am tired please lets not have to talk about anything)...your not mad at me about anything? You aren't having your time of the month? Just to put it nicely for the few men that read my blog. I am always like dude does it always have to be that time of the month for me to be a girl and to cry? I do feel and have emotions...ok. I just usually don't cry a lot.
-Her bitterness turns into worship. Sometimes the things we want so desperately are the things that can catapult us closer to the Lord the most. I can speak on this one from experience...BIG TIME. I have looked over my life often and praised God for the ways I have seen Him work through my trials and heartaches and I wouldn't trade it for anything...because it is the very thing that has brought me to Him.
19 Early the next morning they arose and worshiped before the LORD and then went back to their home at Ramah. Elkanah lay with Hannah his wife, and the LORD remembered her.
-God remembered her. He opened her womb in His timing. He is good and His ways are perfect. He is loving toward all He has made.
Psalm 84:11
11 For the LORD God is a sun and shield;
the LORD bestows favor and honor;
no good thing does he withhold
from those whose walk is blameless.
Hannah has a child and Samuel and he is one of my favorite prophets in the OT. Anyway, she then knows that he is a little blessing from the Lord and she gives that little guy back to the Lord in a sacrifice of praise. You just need to read the rest for yourself.
You give and take away
my heart will choose to say
blessed be Your Name
Though there is pain in the offering
blessed be Your Name.
Gotta run!
Thursday, January 31, 2008
my continuation
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Anxiety from snoring
**EDITED to say this: For two nights Rod has fallen asleep on the couch and I have not been waking him up so I could secretly get some snore free sleep in my own soft bed. ;) That seems to be working pretty good!
I don't know what it is...
but...
nothing seems to get under my skin more than Rods snoring. Seriously, it gives me anxiety it is so loud. Just when I start to drift off to sleep it starts up. Like a thorn in my flesh (a loud snoring thorn) it gets to me bad.
I have kicked, pushed, hit, tried breathing strips, and snore spray, to no avail...and no the manly man is not going to go to a sleep clinic before anyone suggests it. He just thinks I need to sleep in the other room. How does Morgan sleep through this? How do I stay in the power of the Holy Spirit? Is His grace really sufficient for my weakness? Y'all know I am playing with my dramatic post but part of me is so serious. It makes me want to freak out. I never had these anxiety issues at night until I got married. Oh well. I have tried loud fans to drown it out, earplugs which seem to muffle the loudness of it all. Even when I sleep in another room the noise fills and permeates the whole house. What to do...what to do?!?! Well, Morgan is feeding Elmo some chips gotta run!
Love Sleepless in Alabama!
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Proverbs 31 Ministries
PLEASE GO HERE and register to win! I just found this today from Boomamas site. I would love to go and learn more about writing!!! =)
from Walkintheword.com
from my fave! www.walkintheword.com
Dr. James MacDonald
Healing Family Hurts
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Have you got some hurdles to overcome in your family relationships? You know-some things that need to change and improve at your house? All of us can at one time or another admit to family problems, causing family pain.
I have just one word to offer you as you seek help and healing for your family: love. Love is relational dynamite that obliterates all obstacles in its path. Talking won’t do that for you. Pressuring won’t; prodding, insisting, demanding, getting selfish-these all will only tear your life and family apart. But 1 Corinthians 13:8 says, “Love never fails.”
Love never fails to what? Let me point out three things that it will handle for you:
#1 Love never fails to conquer selfishness. I am selfish and so are you. We never have to work at self; it’s just right there barking for attention. Love conquers the biggest obstacle in me: selfishness.
#2 Love never fails to conquer skepticism. Over time, it’s easy to doubt that anything is ever going to change. Your family disappoints you and you want to bail but love holds on.
But James, we’ve got real problems over at our house and some pep talk on love is not going to fix it.
You’re right-that’s why we need 1 Corinthians 13:6, “[Love] does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.”
#3 Love never fails to rejoice in the truth. Love doesn’t sit back in some happy delusion that everything will be okay. Love doesn’t deny problems, but works to see them changed. Love is an action before it’s a feeling.
Here’s your assignment this week:
- In love, serve your family when they choose to be selfish.
- In love, humble yourself before your family when conflict creates distance.
- In love, forgive your family by releasing them from the obligation that resulted when they hurt you. Don’t hold it over them.
- And lastly, in love, speak God’s Word in any situation regardless of the cost. Truth, delivered with love, is what sets us free.
Love gives God an opportunity to work. It’s a tool in His hands to work through you in helping your family.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Here is another one that I hung up in my hallway. I did this one a few years ago. I ALWAYS use a paint pen to write out the scripture. I HAVE NO patience to do it with a paint brush. It is not that great but a good way for me to Deut 6:9 "Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates."
This is such a bad shot of this pic and it was taken with the camera phone. Anyway, I am not finished with it...but it is a crown (or supposed to be LOL) it is a cute green with white polka dots to match the colors in morgs room. =)
LOL and poor Morgan
For those of you that don't know LOL stands for Laugh out loud...or we could make it mean lots of love...anyway...
I am about to go to sleep and it just occurred to me that Morgan is supposed to dress up as a nursery rhyme character tomorrow morning. aahh! It is supposed to be something you can get from your house and you aren't supposed to buy anything. So, y'all...poor Morgan. It just hit me in a moment of despair. She is going to be Mary had a little lamb. For a low budget costume I am going to make her a name tag that reads "Mary" and make her hold one of her little lambs. I thought of this all by myself...can you tell?
I also am finishing my post that is a continuation to my last one for anyone who cares. I will publish it in the morning as I seek to study and eat yet another bagel at Panera!! =)
Ramblings from my weekend
I am soooo tired but I wanted to post about some stuff while I have a moment of silence. Morg. (a.k.a. baby in the bunny blanket by Bev) and I had a good weekend. Rod went hunting on Thursday so it was just me and the sweetie for a few days. Saturday we went to the lake and spent the afternoon with Rods mom and sister. Rod's sister cut my hair (she is a professional btw) and it was free! Praise the Lord! Then, she taught me how to make homemade lasagna. I am a late bloomer when it comes to that dish. I felt like I was at a restaurant...only it was free. She amazed me with her ability to just whip up a lasagna real fast. Also, I am not sure why...but everyone seems to make better salad than me. Morgan ate the snot out of some salad. They are such precious people and I am blessed to have them in my life. Okay...then this morning I got up and got morg a bath and dressed her for church. I felt burdened this morning to stay home and spend time with the Lord where I could actually hear from Him in silence. I needed it badly. I don't like to miss church but I did today. I had some stuff on my heart along with some anxiety that needed to be dealt with. As I was reading this morning and going through specific verses about fear I began to think about why I was anxious. I really believe the answer is that I get anxious due to fear. The Lord really spoke courage in my heart as I sought His help this morning in my situation. I was reading this in Psalm 91:9-10
9 If you make the Most High your dwelling—
even the LORD, who is my refuge-
10 then no harm will befall you,
no disaster will come near your tent.
I can't stand when people tell me the Old Testament is the old covenant and so they sort of just dismiss it. No, we can't apply everything to our life from the OT but God sure means to teach us and speak to us about who HE is from the Old Testament. DON'T GET ME STARTED! How would we see the holiness of God, the fact that no sacrifice was good enough for our sins, the anger and wrath over sin, the affection that God has for His people, the providence, the mercy, the depth of human emotion that comes from the Psalms....how could we even begin to grapple with any of this without the Old Testament? 1 Corinthians 10:6 says that
6Now these things occurred as examples to keep us from setting our hearts on evil things as they did.
So, I am done with my OT tangent. The Old Testament is RELEVANT. I can't even tell you what it means to me to be able to open up God's holy word and relate to men like David...who loved God with a passion and yet fell into sin...and after all was said and done he was called a man after God's own heart. I love to see Moses and how God, in His providence and in spite of all odds, molded him to be the one who would lead the Israelites out of slavery. I have got to know these truths down in my core and I have got to know for myself that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. Especially when in my own life I have sinned so grievously against my Father. He didn't resist the repentant then and He won't now. OK take a breath Jenny. Back to psalm 91...in prayer today I acknowledged that I had seriously been trying to take matters in my own hands and fight my own battle with carnal weapons. Those verses popped out to me because God usually gave a command with a promise...in those verses He said that if He would be our dwelling place then no harm would befall them. For application I felt like the Lord was trying to show me to hide myself in Him, to lean on Him, run to Him, rest in Him, and let Him take care of my enemies through abiding in Him. When I attempt to fight my own battle with pride, I lose, and I do a lot of damage to myself and others. If I am wronged or if someone is mistreating me...I need to go to Him in prayer before I attempt to lash out, control, or try to fix things.
Real quick...my bible has been falling open to James and here is something I needed to be reminded of:
James 1: 19-20
19My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.
The word for slow in this passage is the word Bradys (which is also a latin word...go Jenny!! I got that from my medical transcription...LOL) it means "slow. It stands in contrast to tachys swift quick. (1) Reluctant, dull, unresponsive (2) cautious, deliberate, not in knee-jerk, reactionary fashion.
This may be a word for you if you are good at fighting back and reacting in the flesh. I got the message loud and clear this morning and I want it to stick. If I will hide myself in Him, let Him fight my battles, and not react with some knee-jerk reaction...He will protect me. When I choose to go on my own in disobedience He will remove that protection from me because He sets Himself against the proud. I will set myself in opposition to THE LORD...when I choose to handle things my way. By His commands we are warned...I love these verses which explain what I am trying to say:
Psalm 19:9-13
9 The fear of the LORD is pure,
enduring forever.
The ordinances of the LORD are sure
and altogether righteous.
10 They are more precious than gold,
than much pure gold;
they are sweeter than honey,
than honey from the comb.
11 By them is your servant warned;
in keeping them there is great reward.
12 Who can discern his errors?
Forgive my hidden faults.
13 Keep your servant also from willful sins;
may they not rule over me.
Then will I be blameless,
innocent of great transgression.
I will continue to live in a state of anxiety and oppression when I continually fend for myself instead of waiting on God to act.
So, this brings me to a passage I have been thinking about so much involving Hannah...but so I don't bore you to death I will break it up into another post. =)
Friday, January 25, 2008
tag im it!
Real quick before I complete my tag...I need to tell you that I think I am going to make a citizens arrest. Can I do that? I pulled into my subdivision tonight and something strange caught my eye. Is that Christmas lights I see? Is today not January 25th? So, I go a completely different way to scope it out. Yes, it is affirmative, Christmas lights are up and on!
On another note...the morganater pulled a kid by her hair in chic-fil-a tonight. It was a big scene in the play area and I had to spank her, she fake cried, and we left. D-R-A-M-A. My kid is a bully! ****EDITED TO ADD: My worst fears are coming true...Morgan is officially a booger picker. Yes you heard me right...she is picking her boogers and eating them...sick! Did she learn this from her dad? At least the picking the nose thing? It sure was not me! PLEASE tell me if you have a kid that they did this to!?!?
Leigh tagged me and get ready to be bored!! LOL
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE ? No but I changed my name from Jennifer to Jenny when I was five because EVERYONE was named Jennifer and I did not want to be like everyone else.
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Last weekend
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? yes
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? gross
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? one in heaven and little morgan
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? nope
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? yes...oops
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? no, I had them taken out 4 years ago and please don't talk to me after anesthesia.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? If I wanted to have a panic attack not kidding
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? I don't like cereal or milk
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? no
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? just call me shera princess of power. LOL! people say I am but I don't think so.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? oh yay!! Lactose free breyers natural vanilla it is my FAVE!
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? their butt...i mean what is this? (sarcasm...lol) no, I notice whether they make eye contact or not
15. RED OR PINK? red all my life...but changing to pink
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF? There are so many things but I hate when I don't take God at His word...choose to sin choose to suffer in the words of James MacDonald.
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? my old high school boyfriend...I AM KIDDING. This is a hard one...I do miss friends that live out of town.
18. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Gray cords that I got from the thrift store for 3 dollars. Some girl like hounded me to buy them there because she said they were really expensive pants and she couldn't fit into them and just knew I could. They are called silver jeans or something. I do like them a lot! Red shoes..i love shoes
19. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? kids cheeseburger from burger king with cheese and ketchup only.
20. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Thomas the train i am sick of it!
21. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? red
22. FAVORITE SMELLS? I love it when Rod stinks up the bathroom...kidding. I love love love the smell of my baby girl!
23. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My little sister Steph
24. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? um none...thank you.
25. HAIR COLOR? dark brown
26. EYE COLOR? hazel
27. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? yes.
28. FAVORITE FOOD? mexican-chicken quesidilla, beans, and rice, with cheese dip on top to be exact. I also like kids meals
29. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? happy endings
30. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Thomas' Great Adventure...snore.
31. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? white and gray r u bored yet?
32. SUMMER OR WINTER? summer
33. HUGS OR KISSES? it depends. i love getting my sugars from morg.
34. FAVORITE DESSERT? soft baked choc chip cookies and my ice cream. Oh hold the phone...I LOVE LITTLE DEBBIES
35. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? Moses and don't get me started. I love it!!
36. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? dont have one
37. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? sprout and noggin
38. FAVORITE SOUNDS? my praise mix.
39. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? none
40. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Mexico and Baltimore
41. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? nope
42. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? bham
I AM SO BORING!!
I tag Charity and Darla!
Because when you are two...
Morgan threw a cup of water on the floor on purpose last night and of course we headed straight up to her room for time out. I told you before she hates time out.
Well, she decided this time she was not going to spend her energy crying in her room. So...when I hear quiet I get a little nervous because she is ALWAYS into mischief if things are quiet. So, I head up stairs to find her stripped down...no diaper and she was desperately trying to get one of the cutest 2 piece bikini's on. I couldn't do anything but laugh she was so cute. She is Queen of my heart that is for sure. One piece of advice people give constantly is to cherish the time because it goes bye so fast...don't worry I truly do. Nothing has brought more joy to my life than this little sweetie and I have savored every single day with her! So, I of course let her (along with a new diaper) get her bikini on. This was important stuff. I love the way her belly sticks out and she is just so proud. I wish I felt proud with a belly! LOL! So, it hit me...she saw a picture of her this summer in her swimsuit in her baby pool and so she was desperately trying to get outside in 34 degree weather to recreate the moment. I talked her into wearing her jammies over the swimsuit. Because she is two she is laying asleep next to me with her bathing suit and jammies on and I promised her she could go swimming in the tub this morning. So cute!! ps I actually went to bed before midnight and I swear I regret it since I am up at 3am!! WHAT WHAT?
Also, I think I have been wrestling God in my sleep or something I have been in some pain ever since my bragging on the clean kitchen. dang!
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Things That War Against the Soul
1 Peter 2:10-12
10Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.
11Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul. 12Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.
It always amazes me when I listen with my heart how God brings sermons, bible studies, and etc to the same theme bringing unity to the message He wants driven into my heart and mind.How many times do you and I let this world system, culture, or what people say about us define who we think we are? God says that in Christ we are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, we are holy, loved, chosen by God, saints (set apart ones), washed, forgiven.
1 Peter 2:9
But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.
The Lord has really been speaking to my heart over this (through scripture and other sermons) wanting me to believe who I am in Him. He doesn't want me to just know it as a fact or something on a page but He wants me to know it down in the bone and marrow. Something Beth Moore has often said that has stuck out to me for years is that we act out what we truly believe. She is dead on. We desperately need Gods truth to sink down deep in us or when the storms come in life we will not stand.
I have been having a time in the desert (not dessert...LOL) where the Lord has been testing me and stripping me of well me, and bringing things to the surface that need to be dealt with. If I do not believe what God says to be true of me I will inevitably look for worth and fulfillment in something else. This passage of scripture tells us who we are in Christ and then it admonishes us to stay away from the fleshly lusts (KJV) that war against our soul. The word for fleshly is:
4559 sarkikos {sar-kee-kos'}
Meaning: 1) fleshly, carnal 1a) having the nature of flesh, i.e. under the control of the animal appetites 1a1) governed by mere human nature not by the Spirit of God 1a2) having its seat in the animal nature or aroused by the animal nature 1a3) human: with the included idea of depravity 1b) pertaining to the flesh 1b1) to the body: related to birth, linage, etc
And the word for lust is:
1939 evpiqumi,a epithumia {ep-ee-thoo-mee'-ah}
Meaning: 1) desire, craving, longing, desire for what is forbidden, lust
When you and I are walking in the flesh not yielding or submitting to God we will live for the things of the flesh and reap destruction. Unfortunately, I know about making poor choices that have harmed me. When we seek to live and walk in the Spirit our lives will bring forth fruit that will last and we will have peace in our souls.
I have always struggled with insecurity. Growing up I so desperately wanted to please everyone but no matter what I did it didn't seem to make anyone happy enough. Then along the way in certain relationships I would allow other people to define me with their words. One day after much frustration it was like the Lord whispered to my heart, "Jenny, forget what anyone else says about you...who do I say you are?" I had to make a decision to yes learn from criticism, but to not let what others say define me as a person if it is in contradiction to what God says of me. Being insecure will lead to all manner of desperate decisions and attempts to try to find love. It will bring you to the things that war against your soul and often wound you when you seek your worth in anyone but God.
I can still remember things that were said to me, fiery arrows that were shot straight to my heart, and I let those things have control over me. I remember hearing things like you are an accident, I hate you, you're an idiot, you get the picture and those things would wound and I would think well they know me so it must be true. Then, over the years I let a lot of peoples actions define me...what they didn't do or the emotional rejection I felt, define me as well.
If you have never struggled with this I praise God. All I am trying to say is if you and I don't let the love of God sink into our parched and barren souls we will set ourselves up for disaster, always seeking to be affirmed by this world or other people in my life. It will suck our will to live. God will allow people to fail us in order to open our eyes to the One who will never leave us or forsake us. He will also use these divine set ups to teach us that no one can fill us it is truly impossible. If we seek others to define our worth they become idols in our lives. God for sure provided others for fellowship but we are not to bow down and take on a yoke of oppression to someone we have let (define us) or become "a god" in our life. WHO DOES GOD SAY YOU ARE? Search it out. Ask Him to free you from all of the lies you have believed so that you can walk securely with your God.
I was reading Job and something really stood out to me in the footnotes. It said that maybe the enemy used Job's friends bad counsel to tempt him to sin against God. I think he for sure knows where we are weak and if this is an issue for us he is going to use it to our demise to get us to live in defeat. Lets not let that creep get the victory. If you are in Christ, the Lord Jesus set His affection on you. He loved you so much that He died for you and one day in the blink of an eye...He is coming in a very real tangible way...He is coming for you. So no matter the rejection, you are not rejected by God. He bought you at a price, while you and me were dead in our sins. Allow Him to kick down the walls you have put around your heart in a measly attempt to guard your own heart yourself. When you guard your heart without giving it to Him to guard, you set yourself up for a lot of bitterness, which will take root and spread like a cancer into your whole being and even permeate those around you.
I wish I could open up and be so honest of all the ways I have been tested with this but it is between me and the Lord. It is my prayer for us that we don't waste our life here trying to feel affirmed by this world...it is a beast that will never be tamed. I pray that we will believe God and go on with Him even if our family rejects us (in not loving us the way we want to be loved), our friends reject us, or even our husband rejects us. We have got to believe God and no longer live like a victim waiting for the world or people to love us, when God loves us so much. We are to be a peculiar people (not in some weird way) and a people that are set apart to declare the praises of the One who called us out of darkness into His marvelous light. To do this we are going to have to walk by faith and not by sight (or how we feel). We are not who we once were anymore. We are not to walk like we once did...and it is easy to return to that if you aren't allowing God to have His way in you and if you aren't replacing lies with truth. I sure don't want to be the dog returning to her vomit, like the fool who returns to her folly. Vomit tastes nasty, LOL! I have had enough of my own junk.
2 Corinthians 5:7 We live by faith, not by sight.
Psalm 45:11
11 The king is enthralled by your beauty;
honor him, for he is your lord.
Oh and on a completely different note I strained my back from cleaning the floor. I guess pride comes before the fall since I was bragging about it. =) I really was kidding though. I prayed that the Lord would let Morgan be calm for me and the child has been so good it isn't even funny she has been laying in the bed with me watching Thomas for hours now. He is making us lie down in green pastures....;)
In honor of you!
I am eating a bagel at Panera in honor of all of my blogging siestas (aka sisters) right now. =) Which means I won't be able to consume food for the rest of the day!
*Just as a side note...my name growing up was "radar" because I would pay attention to ten different things at once and while I am here studying I am people watching and eaves dropping (oops). I am currently listening to a guy talk to his pregnant woman (I just found out she was pregnant by their conversation) and he is a history teacher. I don't think they are married. They are way too into each other to be married ;) and I don't see any rings. He is showing her map after map and she is trying not to act bored. I would love to get into some history discussion with him but it wouldn't be appropriate. Anyway, I seriously don't think they are believers based on their conversation (making jokes about Christians and mocking missionaries)...what a shame too because the dude is loaded in some historical info (if you have done Daniel..by bethie you will remember how important biblical history is with prophecy and etc...don't make me make you name all the parts of the statue in Daniel..empires and metals...but I know you can do it). Oh wait...he is wanting to go to Palestine. I wanna go! Gotta get back to work...does anyone listen in besides me?
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Not to brag or anything because that would be wrong...
Seriously, I have spent the last couple of hours in my kitchen cleaning and you could very seriously now sit down on my tile floor and eat off of that floor with me. But we would have to be crazy to do that.
Charity got me thinking about the Magic eraser*s. I so love them! So, I bleached the counters and etc and then began to get on my hands and knees to clean the floor. I am not ready to say goodbye to my mop because sometimes the wetjet* just doesn't do the trick. If you have ceramic tile and the grout has gotten very dirty...and if you are real bored j/k...(oh I buy the generic erasers from Walmart) take that eraser and you will be shocked as you clean that grout how clean it gets. It also gets grease off...I use it to clean my leather couches (probably not a good idea but I do it anyway and it works beautifully). I practically use those bad boys everywhere...I use it to get scuff marks off all of the doors. I have always loved to clean but then I get really mad when things start messing up. I used to vacuum the carpet like the way a football field was cut and I would ask my sisters to walk on the couches to keep from messing up my fresh vacuum tracks (can anybody say crazy...and thankfully I am free from that madness). My next carpet of choice will be berber). I had major issues back then and almost went into a melt down over it because I wanted some order. So, I really don't get all compulsive with the cleaning...just a few pet peeves...like 1. No dishes left in the sink ever. 2. toilets must be cleaned on a continual basis especially when you have a child who likes to dip her bippee in them. 3. I do like my floors to be vacuumed so I keep the vacuum out as a stationary item...kind of like furniture. 4. I don't like to get behind on laundry. Does anyone have any cleaning pet peeves or am I the only one?
My house has a long long way to go but the kitchen is a start! have i bored you to death or what?
Another thing real quick. Rod comes home tonight with a 20 pound bag of boneless chicken (which is great because I don't eat meat on the bone) that he got free from a customer (uh hum...the Lord). I am really trying to be frugal and I just accepted this as some quail (Exodus 16) from the Lord. I have raw meat issues but I divided up all of the chicken into plastic bags and I must admit I grumbled that the raw meat was getting on my hands (Rod knows I hate it and he accidentally flung some raw chicken juice in my face...sick)...I even told the Lord out loud that I was sorry for complaining about what He provided because of my raw meat issues...but I put it back on Him and told Him that He made me this way...LOL! We will be having chicken a thousand different ways and maybe even eating it off of the floor...yummy. I seriously love His provision for me and my family when I wait on Him.
conversations
Me: Morgan we are going to have a good day today aren't we! (notice this is a statement not a question)
Morgan: No!
She has started wanting to paint (PAINT!?!?). If we aren't painting, watching veggie tales, eating candy, drinking sprite, playing with trains, and messing up the whole house...it is not a good day to her. I am seriously in the throes of the terrible twos..thank God she is cute!! Also, I will seek to define throes for everyone because that is what is going on here (LOL):
| a sharp attack of emotion. |
throes,
|
and she really must have decided she was seriously not going to have a good day because she is pitching the most royal fit ever over not wanting to sit in her chair and eat. I wish those were my battles!!
I need some HELP from the Lord. =) If you are doing "Stepping Up" I hope you have that passage down or that you get it down...it is so good!
HELP HELP MOMMY she screams!! gotta go get her!
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
blah blah
Check out Amy's blog she designed it herself!! Also, you have to read Maryanna's post on hot chocolate. so good. (These are some more of my local friends LOL)
Also, don't tell Rod but I have been thinking about another man ALL DAY...his name is Moses..you can read about him in Exodus. Gotta get back to my book, I am enthralled by it and a bit obsessed with studying his life...
I can never tell how bible study went but I hope it went well! Thanks for praying!! =)
ps I was getting my praise on in the car and I just love this ("Friend for Life" by Watermark) song. I love this verse so much!!
Come and ruin me with Your love
So no other is enough
Come and leave Your mark on me
Please ruin me with Your love Lord so that no other is enough...leave your mark on me Jesus...more of thee...more of thee!!
Friend for life
Who took my pain
The cleansing flood
You remain
Wash over me
Till I can't be seen
Living Water swallow me
Deepest river wash me clean
Jesus, Savior more of thee
Jesus, more of thee
Come and ruin me with Your love
So no other is enough
Come and leave Your mark on me
Jesus, more of thee
Jesus, more of thee
Friend for life
I'll carry on
Through the power
Of this flood
Let it spill over, over
Till I can't be seen
Living Water swallow me
Deepest river wash me clean
Jesus, Savior more of thee
Jesus, more of thee
Come and ruin me with Your love
So no other is enough
Come and leave Your mark on me
Jesus, more of thee
Jesus, more of thee
Deep is the stain
Inside of me
But deeper the river
That washes me clean
I've been the one
Who cries in the night
But you've been
The friend of my life
Living Water swallow me
Deepest river wash me clean
Jesus, Savior more of thee
Jesus, more of thee
Come and ruin me with Your love
So no other is enough
Come and leave Your mark on me
Jesus, more of thee
Jesus, more of thee
Jesus, more of thee
C2001 Sweather Weather MusicRocketown MusicWord Music, Inc. (ASCAP)
p.s.s. Janel gave me THIS...she is so sweet!!
I share the love with all of you! you are awarded!
Shout Out!
Two things:
1. Let me know if you are going to do "No other gods" online with us.
2. I want to know who all is going to San Antonio?!?!? If you don't know what I am talking about then you probably aren't going. =) LPL event in August (Beth Moore).
My bible study is tonight...can't wait! Say a prayer if you think of us!
Moses
When my friend Jessica came to visit me we made a trip (or a couple of trips) to Lifeway. I am such a nerd and I love love love bookstores. I love good books. I especially LOVE character studies. I love to feel like I am walking on the pages of Scripture as I dig in and grow in Gods word. Jessica, Morgan, and I spent several hours in there that day. The Charles "Chuck" Swindoll series books were half price and she had just started his book on Elijah. Well, I love learning together so we can talk about what we are learning...but as I stared at the books I began to pray that God would put on my heart the one that was for me.
I have been begging for a word as I have felt like I am in a dry place for the last year...my Negev (Negeb "Negev" means parched in Hebrew), as I call it. I have been so thirsty for the Lord. There have been days lately where I feel like I have not had one second to steal away with the Lord (Morgan is even up now). I have been in the word but it hasn't been without distraction. I have been so tense, so stressed out, and so frustrated for so many reasons (and as a disclaimer please don't feel sorry for me I am just telling you where I am).
So, back to Lifeway...as I looked and prayed my heart went to Moses. I can not even begin to tell you what a word this book has been for me at this time. I can not even begin to describe the times I am reading and I am like was he reading my mind? You know what I mean. Anyway, this book will shatter your ideas of "Moses" that you have seen on the "Ten Commandments" movie if you have never studied the life of Moses. I praise God for knowing what I need and when I need it. If only I would trust Him more.
If you ever feel dry, or like you have just blown it, or if you wonder if your life has purpose, or you have missed your calling...this may be a timely word for you as well. I just had to share...I am so grateful for the Lord using this book to draw me closer to the pages of Scripture.
Monday, January 21, 2008
from Dr. James MacDonald www.walkintheword.com
Stick With Today
"Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? . . . But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.
Matthew 6: 25-27, 33
How often do you wake up in the middle of the night with burdens on your heart that keep you from going back to sleep?
It happened to me last night. The clock said, 4:10 a.m. and I was wide awake.
Baggage from yesterday and worries about tomorrow weighed heavily on my mind. What Jesus said in Matthew 6:34 is true. “Therefore, do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”
Do you start the day thinking, “I don’t have enough on my mind today. I’m going to borrow trouble from tomorrow and make up some new problems”? Yeah, me neither. The word trouble means adverse circumstances, problems, hardship. And for certain, each day has enough of its own.
Jesus says in effect, “Let’s compartmentalize here. You can’t carry the weight of the past-that’s what forgiveness is for. You can’t carry all the uncertainties of the future-that’s what faith is for; you must focus on today. Let’s deal with what we can.”
We weren’t made for anxiety. The manufacturer’s specifications do not allow for worry. It’s no different than if someone poured sugar in your gas tank or introduced a virus to your computer. Worry does that to the human spirit. When you gather up in your mind on a regular basis a list of all the unknowns of the future and repeatedly review and extrapolate, the uncertainties become so large that it will crush you. Everything gets sideways when you’re on the anxiety program.
You were not fashioned for fear.
You were not wired for worry.
You were made to live today-“Sufficient for the day is its own trouble”-to focus on the things that you can affect, to work on the things that you can improve that are right in front of you.
You and I have limited capacity. We can’t carry yesterday or our imagined tomorrow. We’ve got to trust the Lord today, from one day’s 4 a.m. to the next.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Rick Burgess' son Bronner
**LATEST UPDATE** From MyFoxAL
Please pray for the Burgess family. Bronner their two year old son drowned yesterday.HERE is the statement on their website. They were actually a few rooms down (when Bronner was born) when I was in the hospital on bed rest with Morgan. So sad.
CLICK HERE to read the article from the Birmingham News.
CLICK HERE to read the article from ABC/3340
Message from Scott Dawson
Saturday, January 19, 2008
I See, I Hear, I Am Concerned
Aren't we all faced with the temptation to give up when we feel God isn't coming through in our situation? Whether it be our marriage, income, relationships, our job, deliverance, our own spiritual progress, or whatever...
I was reading this from "Moses" by Charles (Chuck) Swindoll and it was so timely.
"Do you ever imagine that your hard, harsh moments and tests escape God's notice? You may become so discouraged, so filled with acute pain, that you begin to think God couldn't be aware of your circumstances, or, if He is aware, then He doesn't care. That's a lie from the evil one himself.
God is always aware. And He cares very deeply. As we will see, He will do whatever it takes to rescue His people. It may be by calling you home to Himself, or it may be by splitting an ocean right down the middle so you can walk on dry ground. His deliverance may not arrive on your timetable or in the manner you expect it, but it will arrive at the best time, the right time. He will not abandon His own."
Moses, Chuck Swindoll pg 16, 17
I had gotten myself into a rut of biting and devouring instead of waiting and praying. I decided in a situation that I would fend for myself instead of crying out to God. I didn't verbally declare this but by my actions I was completely disobedient. In this cycle of disobedience to God's word, it became easier and easier to be disobedient and harder to stop and give the thing over to the Lord. Sorry for being so generic. I was reminded as I read the following verses that God hears, and most definitely takes note of my cries even if the situation doesn't change for a time. God is faithful even in the midst of our adversity. Please pay attention to what I have bolded. In whatever it is that you have battled for a long time and you are growing weary of it having power over you...God sees...God hears...He is concerned...He will rescue you as you wait on Him...Your cry reaches His ear...He sent us a Deliverer who will rescue us continually.
Exodus 3:7-10
7 The LORD said, "I have indeed seen the misery of my people in Egypt. I have heard them crying out because of their slave drivers, and I am concerned about their suffering. 8 So I have come down to rescue them from the hand of the Egyptians and to bring them up out of that land into a good and spacious land, a land flowing with milk and honey—the home of the Canaanites, Hittites, Amorites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites. 9 And now the cry of the Israelites has reached me, and I have seen the way the Egyptians are oppressing them. 10 So now, go. I am sending you to Pharaoh to bring my people the Israelites out of Egypt." (emphasis mine)
These scriptures stood out to me and spoke so much to me tonight that though my deliverance may tarry to wait for it and submit to my loving Father...my deliverance will come. In the meantime change me while I wait Lord.
SNOW!!
**EDITED to add the Alabama tour of snow!! ALISSA, AMY, SUZANNE, LEIGH, HEATHER, HEWY
Morgan building her mo-man...that is what she calls a snowman
These are all from Rods camera phone...but this one is so cute to me. Notice the bags I tied around her shoes LOL! Her dad wanted to know where her snow boots were. Okay since it snows once every decade in AL why would I buy snow shoes?!!
Does she remind you of the kid from "A Christmas Story"?
This is my child praying and thanking God for some snow...j/k...but it looks like it!
oobi
Um this show doesn't seem to scare Morgan but it sure creeps me out. It is called oobi on Noggin. does anyone feel the same?
Friday, January 18, 2008
I am so stinking excited!!!
Okay! I started a new bible study today...the Lord is so good!
I am thrilled beyond words and so excited that I can not type fast enough. Since I had done all of Beth Moore's it was time to break free and move on to another teacher for such a time as this...LOL!
So, I looked and prayed and looked and prayed and BAM the one I was supposed to do appeared before my eyes on the shelf at Lifeway. DRUM ROLL here it is
"No Other Gods" by Kelly Minter. The girl is so real, which is a must for me! I get tired of trying to find a bible study and it being so vague and "churchy". I also can't stand fake or pretense. Just give it to me straight!
Let me know if you get this and want to do it with me. I am pretty sure I will be leading this one after my "Stepping Up" is over. Click on that link above and tell me what you think!
She starts out in the beginning talking about our modern day "functional gods" and she uses this verse to speak about how we in essence say things but our actions don't match up. 2 Kings 17:33 They worshiped the LORD, but they also served their own gods in accordance with the customs of the nations from which they had been brought.
This verse hit hard this morning because I can't even tell you the times I have been divided in my heart toward the Lord. I have served Him but also had other things or people that I set my heart on that took the place of God. Fear, relationships, image, fear of failure and stuff are just to name a few things that have driven me or caused me to stay paralyzed in life. Then the next verse she uses that I love is this: 41 Even while these people were worshiping the LORD, they were serving their idols. To this day their children and grandchildren continue to do as their fathers did.
Oh this hit hard today...we can be worshipping the Lord but holding our idols in the other hand with a death grip because they have driven us for so long it is what is comfortable and what begins to define us (these are my thoughts at least). I am reminded of these verses: Isaiah 44:19-20
19 No one stops to think, no one has the knowledge or understanding to say, "Half of it I used for fuel; I even baked bread over its coals, I roasted meat and I ate. Shall I make a detestable thing from what is left? Shall I bow down to a block of wood?"
20 He feeds on ashes, a deluded heart misleads him; he cannot save himself, or say, "Is not this thing in my right hand a lie?"
So often we allow things to creep into our lives and we really begin to have a driving need for them when in essence they can not deliver on the promises these idols make...they are a lie. The enemy wants to deceive us into thinking people, or things, or position (even in the church), can give us what we really need. They can't and we keep coming back to try to get full because they didn't do it for us. No one and nothing can take the place of God, but we will spend ourselves in vain trying to feel the aching places. I don't even think we realize it most of the time.
One thing I read in the Hebrew lexical aides years ago about idolatry is that the reason God hates it so much is because it is in essence the worship of satan. I am not talking about not having things and never watching television or shopping what I am talking about is do the things we have and seek after have us? Because we are not a people who are safe if the Lord does not whole heartedly have us. I am sure you can testify to this in your own life.
So what do we do? Our idols must be cast down. That is what I am going to work with the Lord on thru this study and I am sure for the rest of my life. It is so true in my life and yours that what we worship begins to control us and drive us and we labor toward that end. Maybe I am the only one ;).
Yum!
These verses have been on my heart for the last couple of days. I love how a verse will rise up in me like the Psalm 42:8 that I didn't even remember that I knew. The Word is powerful...HE truly does write it on our hearts as we seek to know Him!
Psalm 42:8 By day the LORD directs his love, at night his song is with me— a prayer to the God of my life.
Deut 30:19-20
19 This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live 20 and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Because I need to add one more thing to the list of drama this week!
I have literally had to CRY OUT to God today. Morgan began to freak out earlier and was pulling on her ear (the ear where the tube just came out). Well, I was sure by the smell of crayon and the broken white crayon next to her that she must have gotten some stuck in her ear hence the freaking out. So, I called the Dr and they worked us in. Before we left she pulled a frame down and scratched her face. I do watch my child I promise...she is just quick. So, we go and she has an ear infection, no crayon. Meanwhile, my neck is freaking out (my spine is shaped wrong at the top causing major muscular problems...long story short) I think due to stress. So, I have a tentative appointment for tomorrow because the meds I have for my neck are not working. So this is all quite hilarious.
HERE is an article on the cold medicines like the one Morg drank. Part of why I freaked out! =)
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
More! More! MOOOOORE!!
1 John 2:15-17 15Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16For everything in the world—the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does—comes not from the Father but from the world. 17The world and its desires pass away, but the man who does the will of God lives forever.
Psalm 106:14
14 In the desert they gave in to their craving; in the wasteland they put God to the test.
If you came over to my house and spent any time with me and Morg you would hear her say more! More Thomas (the train)...More Spiderman (she likes him but she has not watched him)...More Dora....More Bob the Builder!!
We were in Target the other day and the child screamed MORE at the top of her lungs as we passed whatever she wanted. As I listen to her words I am reminded of how we can be just like that but not necessarily verbalize it. More money, more clothes, more cars, more toys!! We can try so hard to satisfy our wanton cravings. Have you noticed that no matter how much you have gained in the past that it wasn't enough to make you happy. I am not talking about contentment but the search for having MORE to be happy. Surely at some point we have all felt what it is like to try to meet the deep needs of our soul with things. I know I have. Lord deliver us from placing our worth, contentment, and satisfaction in stuff. Satisfy me, satisfy us with You. May we cry out More! More! More of You! More of Your Presence, More of Your Word...More!!
Go to Him for what money can not buy!
Isaiah 55:1-3
Invitation to the Thirsty 1 "Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost.
2 Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and your soul will delight in the richest of fare.
3 Give ear and come to me; hear me, that your soul may live. I will make an everlasting covenant with you, my faithful love promised to David.
Eph 2:1-5
1As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, 2in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. 3All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature[a] and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath. 4But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, 5made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
A Sweet Friend on Blogger!!
Please go visit my friend Maryanna's blogspot!! Y'all you have no idea...NO IDEA...how much of an encourager this girl is. Seriously! She has encouraged me so much over the last few years with cards, text messages, voice mail's, you name it!! Anyway, you will never meet a sweeter girl and I am not playing!! She met me in a closet to pray at church for a few years when I taught in the Singles.
Anyway, CLICK HERE and say hello! She is new to the blog thang'!
Wooo Woooo Wooo
That would be the sound of sirens at my home yet again. The wooo wooo woooo would be what Morgan says when she sees them.
So, Morgan was eating her lunch and I turned my back on her for 1 minute....a minute too long. She gets a bottle of grape dimetap and the child proof cap was broken off and she drinks it. She then comes into the living room and says mmmmmm'. To which I about FREAK out!
I really hope Morgans mimi isn't going to read this ;) because she will be furious with me...
So, I call 911 and about panic. I did not have time to look up poison control and I don't do well in a crisis with my child. The fire dept shows up and so do the neighbors. Her pulse ox was low so they gave her some oxygen. She was kind of lethargic and she was also really calm and good which is not usual. The firemen wanted her to go via ambulance to the ER to monitor her respiratory system.
So we go and they monitored her. Her heart rate was high but she was fine.
Y'all this one is my fault but I am so SICK of this!! I am tired of all of the bills once again piling up with medical expenses. I am also sick of judgmental people who ask questions like "Why are y'all sick all of the time?" BECAUSE WE LOVE IT! We love paying doctor bills!!! No we haven't had a vacation in years because our money goes to the hospitals! I am so glad I have been reading about Jobs friends and the ways they did not comfort him and the idiotic judgmental things they said. I have had my share. Especially at church. There are a lot of Sundays where people will be like Oh where's Rod and I will tell them Morgan is sick or whatever and they are like Oh again. They aren't really concerned just judgmental. I have had my fill of it lately.
Please pray for me and thank you in advance for being so caring!
Monday, January 14, 2008
Diarrhea Cha Cha Cha
I was not going to do this but I am...I am sitting here just laughing out loud...ALL BY MY LONESOME and I need to share a little song I wrote (I didn't write it) like to hear it...here it go:
"When your sliding into first and you feel something burst diarrhea cha cha cha...diarrhea cha cha cha. "
If you were growing up in the 80's please tell me you know these kinds of songs!!
What got me thinking of this is that my most googled post is the one about Taco, Burrito, what's coming out of your speedo you got trouble yeah your blowing bubbles yeah...
No but really Morgan had some of this nastiness today and I also wanted to take a little bathroom survey about the bowels...LOL!
I think I am the ONLY person on the face who has trouble going. The doctor gives me a constipation regimen when I go to see him. It consists of several medicines and mineral oil. So each day I have to load up on the fiber and down the mineral oil. You think I will have good bowels in heaven...because we will be eating and all you know!!
Does anyone have any other home remedies to my problem? Be honest...I know I have just stepped into some uncharted territory!!
My weekend
I am really not loving this picture of me but Jessica (my friend who lives in TN) sent it to me this morning and since my camera is not uploading, I can't sift through the pictures to find a blog worthy one. She always looks cute though!
Jessica came in town friday and we went to eat, then Saturday morning morgan was sick so I took her to the Dr. Poor Jess had to deal with a rowdy 2 year old all weekend. It was fun but I wish we would have had more down time without the tantrums. She was gracious to understand.
We ate so much this weekend that I will not be able to eat for a week to get the weight off!! LOL
Sunday, January 13, 2008
In a world full of change I am glad we have One who does not change. I have heard so many heart breaking things this week. Three people that I am friends with miscarried. I heard of a child drowning to death and another friend just got a bad report of cancer treatments not working. And another who had a stillborn child. This little article was so good.
from gotquestions.org
Question: "What is the immutability of God?"
Answer: The immutability of God (that He does not change) is clearly taught throughout Scripture in countless passages. For example, in Malachi 3:6 God affirms, "I the Lord do not change." (See also Numbers 23:19; 1 Samuel 15:29; Isaiah 46:9-11; Ezekiel 24:14.) James 1:17 tells us “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness nor shadow of turning.” The shadow of turning refers to the sun which eclipses, and turns, and casts its shadow. It rises and sets, appears and disappears every day; and it comes out of one tropic, and enters into another at certain seasons of the year. But with God, who is light itself, there is no darkness at all, there is no change, nor anything like it. He is unchangeable in His nature, perfections, purposes, promises, and gifts. He being holy, cannot turn to that which is evil; nor can He, who is the fountain of light, be the cause of darkness, and since every good and perfect gift comes from Him, evil cannot proceed from him, nor can he tempt any to it. The Bible is very clear that God does not change, neither His mind, His will, nor His nature.
Seen from a logical viewpoint, there are several reasons why it is impossible for God to change. First, if anything changes it must do so in some chronological order. There must be a point in time before the change and a point in time after the change. Therefore, for change to take place it must happen within the constraints of time; however, God is eternal and exists outside of the constraints of time (Psalm 33:11; Psalm 41:13; Psalm 90:2-4; John 17:5; 2 Timothy 1:9).
Second, if anything changes it must change for the better or the worse, because a change that makes no difference is not a change. For change to take place, either something that is needed is added, which is a change for the better, or something that is needed is lost, which is a change for the worse. But since God is perfect, He does not need anything. Therefore, He cannot change for the better. If God were to lose something He would not be perfect; therefore, He cannot change for the worse.
Third, when someone changes his/her mind, it is often because new information has come to light that was not previously known, or the circumstances have changed that require a different kind of attitude or action. Because God is omniscient, He cannot learn something new that He did not already know. So, when the Bible speaks of God changing His mind, it must be understood that the circumstance or situation has changed, not God. So when Exodus 32:14 and 1 Samuel 15:11-29 talk about God changing His mind, it is simply describing a change of dispensation, and outward dealings, toward man.
Numbers 23:19 is very clear, “God is not a man, that He should lie, nor a son of man, that He should change His mind. Does He speak and then not act? Does He promise and not fulfill?” No, God does not change His mind. These verses affirm the doctrine of God’s immutability: He is unchanging and unchangeable.
Recommended Resources for the New Year: Knowing God by J.I. Packer.
!!!!!
I am a BAD MOM....
Morgan has croup. Well, that is not why I am a bad mom...
Her nose was running like a faucet and I decided that she needed a little benadryl to dry it up so she could sleep. Well, I gave her like 3/4's of a teaspoon instead of 1/2 so of course I am up freaking out and checking her to make sure she is alive. NO MORE Benadryl for Morg.
00ps my laptop is dying time to go read about Moses!!
Friday, January 11, 2008
The that is a tunic not a dress memo:
First, from working at the mall I would like to cover the difference between a tunic and a dress because there are some girlies out there that seem to be totally confused on this matter. So, during our time we will seek to define this:
Next, thank you to Susan and Heather for this sweet blog award~
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Entrusting Yourself to Your God
I could probably write a book on the 101 ways to react in the flesh and I would have some real material and skill because I have done it a million times. It is so hard especially when you feel like you are wronged to do the power thing and entrust yourself to the one who is Faithful.
Anyway, I have a personal issue that I am not going to share in blogland...but one where I feel like I have been mistreated time and time again. I am reminded of Hagar once again. Most of you are familiar with the story (If you aren't you can read it here). Abe and Sarai can't get pregnant which of course is a disgrace to them since they had received a promise for offspring and that there was the command to be fruitful and multiply...and even the meaning of Abes name which in Hebrew meant "Exalted father" yet he had zero kids. It was custom for the concubines or maidservants to try to be a surrogate mother so to speak. Well, as it goes Hagar the Egyptian maidservant gets pregnant and then she begins to despise Sarai. First off, I would not be telling my man to go sleep with anyone else for us to have a child...but that is me. It makes me think (even though it was custom) of the desperate decisions that we can make when we idolize something that we think we MUST have to live. Attempting to help God out always breeds some sort of destruction (just look at the whole conflict in the middle east if you want to see the fruit of their attempt to help God out on the promise He gave for descendants). Anyway, here is the part I wanted to get to out of verse 6 of Genesis 16:
"Then Sarai dealt harshly with her, and she fled from her." When I looked up the Hebrew word for harsh or harshly it means what you think she delt with her harshly but in that word is also the word for abuse. I am speculating but maybe Sarai oppressed Hagar by her treatment of her or maybe there was some sort of abuse involved. Sometimes abuse can be verbal, or mental, sometimes it can be making someones life plain miserable.
So, Hagar flees from Sarai. Can you blame her? Then an angel of the Lord finds her by a spring of water and asks her where she is going and also tells her to return and submit to Sarai. And a very well known verse arises out of this:
13So she called the name of the LORD who spoke to her, "You are a God of seeing," for she said, "Truly here I have seen him who looks after me."
God cared about Hagar. He cared that she was mistreated. Just because something is stated in the word of God like the fact that she was mistreated does not mean God approves of the behaviour. Just like his intentions for man to have only one wife...even though people multiplied wives did not mean God approved.
God saw her and He came to her need as she was fleeing from her circumstances. I am not telling anyone here to stay in an abusive relationship but I am trying to give you the message that God has spoken to me...that even when people deal harshly with me or I am mistreated God takes note. We are the apple of His eye and He sees you and He sees me when we are afflicted.
Zechariah 2:8
8 For this is what the LORD Almighty says: "After he has honored me and has sent me against the nations that have plundered you—for whoever touches you touches the apple of his eye-
I love the meaning of the apple of His eye in Hebrew it is
!Avyai 'iyshown {ee-shone'} Meaning: 1) pupil of the eye. It is one of the most important parts of they eye. His children are the apple of His eye. His is omnipresent and sovereign over all and nothing gets past Him. Even if you feel like He is not coming through if anyone mistreats you or oppresses you...He takes note. You are so important to your God.
The part that is going to take some prayer, submission, and entrusting ourselves to the Lord is when we are mistreated and we react in the flesh. We are going to be insulted and mistreated here but we can entrust ourselves to the One who is all knowing and all powerful. That is a challenge for me...not to lash out in my own skin.
Then, we head back over to Genesis 21. For lack of time you can read it for yourself but Hagar and Ishmael are sent away after the weaning party for Isaac when Sarah notices him mocking. This distresses Abe because you have to remember that it is his son to. So they are sent off once again and please remember how dangerous it was to travel back then...especially for a woman. I don't want to get side tracked because we could talk about this for a few days but please go with me and read these verses regarding their trip in the wilderness:
15 When the water in the skin was gone, she put the boy under one of the bushes. 16 Then she went off and sat down nearby, about a bowshot away, for she thought, "I cannot watch the boy die." And as she sat there nearby, she began to sob.
17 God heard the boy crying, and the angel of God called to Hagar from heaven and said to her, "What is the matter, Hagar? Do not be afraid; God has heard the boy crying as he lies there. 18 Lift the boy up and take him by the hand, for I will make him into a great nation."
19 Then God opened her eyes and she saw a well of water. So she went and filled the skin with water and gave the boy a drink.
They not only had physical needs because they were about to die for lack of water...but I believe Hagar had a greater need as well. She needed her eyes to be opened to the living water. She already named Him back in Genesis 16 El Roi. But don't you know this woman felt so alone...so rejected...and then feared the worst of losing her son, a son so precious to her. Don't try to stuff your pain and act like that because you are a Christian you shouldn't feel. God heard their sobs in the desert. He heard the boy crying. Even when you feel so unnoticed, listen to me, YOUR GOD NOTICES...YOUR GOD HEARS.
I sat in my bed yesterday morning so frustrated and with tears I remembered this passage and that God hears me. God stores my tears in a bottle. Then I began to pray: God please open my eyes to the well of refreshment even in my own dry desert. The desert where things look bleak and hopeless at times. Please open my eyes to the fountain of Living Water standing in the midst of it all and let me come and drink deep.
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Tonight
UPDATE ON TONIGHT:
Thank you for your sweet prayers. Tonight went so well. I love the Lord for allowing us the freedom to meet and study His word. Also, I have to tell you something He did for me. I prayed tonight that He would give me the words that He would have me to speak and He led me to Hebrews 11 (in my Spirit). Then, I popped in the Introductory session (I did the workbook but not the dvds) and guess what!!! She spoke on the EXACT same verses. I was talking with a couple of people this weekend about how specific the Lord is and they were like are you sure it just isn't coincidence. I was able to name them one thing after the next that I prayed and that the Lord answered. I had chill bumps at how He showed up tonight. Also, Travis Cottrell sang on the dvd "My Passion". The song does me in!! I can't wait for all of your groups to start!!! Thank you again!! Now I am off to do some bible study paperwork...LOL!!
Tonight I start "Stepping Up" by Beth Moore. Please say a prayer for this group tonight. Please pray that no weapon forged against us would prevail. Please pray that God would bring exactly who He wants to this study and that they would get a fire and passion for Gods word. Also, with every new study I get under a spirit of condemnation so please pray that I would not listen to the enemies lies. Please ask our Father to be there in power. If His presence doesn't go with me...then I don't want to go. Amen.
Thank you in advance and I will update this and let you know how it went. On another note...if you are looking for a study to do...this one is so good. The workbook was wonderful!!!
...and KNOW
When I woke up this morning and tuned my heart to the Lord...I literally heard the words of Psalm 46:10 (10 "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.") in my Spirit. This verse is used so often that we can become used to it. I was pondering the verse to Be still and Know that He is God. Not just to be still...but to Know. To wait for Him in activity as I am being still in terms of allowing my Spirit to be at peace and rest knowing that He will come through in my situation in whatever way He chooses to act...because He is God. As I wait on Him and put my trust in Him...I will see Him in His glorious exaltation. I will know that God and only God came through because I waited on Him and ceased striving in my own strength. This does not mean to sit in your room and be still until the Lord does something. We are to stop trying to manipulate and control everything around us and let God be God.
Then my friend Jessica sent this to me this morning.
From Daily Bread For Today
When Life Goes Bad
David strengthened himself in the Lord his God. —1 Samuel 30:6
Everything looked bleak to David and his men when they arrived at Ziklag (1 Sam. 30:1-6). The Amalekites had attacked the city and taken their wives and children captive. The men were so discouraged that they wept until they had no more energy. And David, their leader, was “greatly distressed” because the people were contemplating stoning him (v.6).In the end, David’s army rescued their families and defeated the Amalekites. But the story takes a great turn even before that when “David strengthened himself in the Lord his God” (v.6). Other translations use the words encouraged or refreshed.The text doesn’t say exactly how David did this. But it makes me wonder, In what ways can we strengthen, encourage, or refresh ourselves in the Lord when we’re feeling discouraged?First, we can remember what God has done. We can list the ways He has cared for us in the past, and how He has provided for us or answe red a prayer request.Second, we can remember what God has promised. “Be strong and of good courage; . . . for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go” (Josh. 1:9).Like David, let’s learn to strengthen ourselves in the Lord, and then let’s leave the rest with Him. —Anne Cetas
“I will strengthen,” so take courage,Child of God, so weak and frail.God has said so, and it must be,For His promise cannot fail! —Anon.
Our greatest strength is often shown in our ability to stand still and trust God.
Sunday, January 6, 2008
more random things
I finished my last day at jjill. YEAH!!
My mother in law bought me this sweater for my parting gift! I had been wanting it...but wasn't going to buy it. She was so sweet and got it for me.
I am loving reading through the bible with Fran and Bev. I am dying for Beth to finish Esther and can't wait to start on that.
I start leading "Stepping Up" Tuesday!! The workbook was VERY good and I can't wait to see the dvds!! Please say a prayer for my group and that we will have women sign up for all of the studies that are offered. I know how much the word has changed my life... I so want that for others!!
my new years resolution (to carry a smaller purse) is still going well. LOL! I am on day 5 of a small purse. It seems like longer but I got tired of carrying the kitchen sink in my purse. I am still not free of not having a big purse and it feels really weird to make the change...but I am ok (kidding)
Here is some link love for Jessica...you need to check out her blog. She is the cutest thing!!
Genesis 21:6
Sarah said, "God has brought me laughter, and everyone who hears about this will laugh with me."
Also, I can not tell you the joy that this little 2 footer has brought to my life. She is the funniest little thing ever! I hope you have some joyous moments in your life because they sure are sweet. I never knew how much God was going to use a sweet little girl to turn my world upside down. I think we spend most of the day laughing at stuff. I also never knew how vulnerable I would be. Last night she fell and hit her head (accident prone like her mother) in the corner of the wall. She had a large hematoma on her head. It scared me so bad and hurt me that she was hurt...and we are only getting started. I am not sure how some of you do it!!
Gotta go to sleep and get ready for church!! =)
Friday, January 4, 2008
Nimrod Trivia
Well, I stayed up until 4:30 this morning so I am so very sleepy...anyway...
A couple of things I wanted to share. I have read this verse many times and was trying to reason my husbands love for hunting and somehow tie it in to the Lord. All I could come up with is that there is something in the name. Rod...Nim"rod".
Genesis 10:9
9 He was a mighty hunter before the LORD; that is why it is said, "Like Nimrod, a mighty hunter before the LORD."
Nim dude was a WARRIOR indeed. This mighty hunter before the LORD thing...
"His name seems to be connected with the verb "to rebel" (marad), tradition has identified him with tyrannical power. He was the founder of the earliest imperial world powers in Babylon and Assyria..."
The mighty hunter is a trait found commonly in Assyrian kings. "He was founder of several poweful cities. The centers he established became major enemies of Israel."
We have also all heard the term Nimrod...when meaning someone is "stupid, silly, or foolish." So, since the Lord in essence named us before the foundations...I got hope in my name...and Rod is Rod...hope for the Nimrod! LOL! Can you tell I am tired!! Is that disrespectful? =) Just trying to tie things in with the word...I am only KIDDING.
No but really...I was going to share about my New Years Eve as well. I never want to broadcast on the internet (in case I have any stalkers j/k) when Rod is gone on a hunt. He left Monday morning and came back yesterday. Well, for New Years Eve Morgan and I went to my favorite restaurant, J. Alexanders. The food was delicious! People always look at me funny when Morgan and I go out to eat. I guess there is some unwritten rule that you can't take your two year old out to eat without looks. The thing is...I can't always wait to live my life or go out to eat when hunting season is over or whatever. I get there and a girl that used to be in my Sunday school class saw me and she had me seated at her table. Then, the hostess figured out what church I went to and told the Regional manager because he goes there to. Well, he came out and spoke to me...so nice. Then, he told my friend that I should order dessert on the house! I usually don't get dessert but we went for it. When they brought the BIG FAT piece of chocolate cake out it had a candle on it. My friend and I share the same bday. I am getting to my point. You remember my post about my bday being cruddy?! Well, the Lord was so sweet to me on New Years Eve. He, along with Morgan, was my date. I truly felt like that cake was from the Lord...to me as a belated bday cake. I got free dinner (thanks to my friend Jessica...she sent me the gift card) and birthday cake.
Morgan and I have a lot of fun together so my time with her is always WELL spent. Remember those my buddy dolls? (I think they had to redo him since he looked a lot like chucky. I won't link to him but he was weird and scary and used to freak my little brother and cousin out!) She is like the real live little my buddy. HERE is the old my buddy commercial if anyone needs a little blast from the past. LOL!!!
ps my quotes are from the Bible Knowledge Commentary on the OT.
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